Wednesday, November 10, 2010

17 Fun Things to Say to Your Partner Just to Be Annoying

1. “Is there a particular reason why you can’t unload the dishwasher? Is it a religious issue?”

2. “That button on the DVR remote that says ‘Erase All’? What happens if you accidentally push that? And what happens if I’m the one that pushed it?”

3. “You think it’s okay that the Christmas boxes are still stacked in the den? Let’s put you in the attic and see how you feel about things being in the wrong place for 11 months of the year.”

4. “I hung up on your brother. Never liked him. Too whiny.”

5. “Can I borrow that book you read? You know, the one that told you it was okay to pick all the meat off the leftover pizza and then shove it back in the refrigerator? That one.”

6. “Do you think I’m prettier than Eva Longoria?”

7. “You do realize that the people on ‘Survivor’ can’t hear you, right?”

8. “What was the name of that restaurant we ate at that one time where they had breadsticks?”

9. “Do you think pudding has feelings?”

10. “I’m taking the kids back to the store. I don’t think these are the ones we ordered.”

11. “I love pencil shavings.”

12. “What’s a word that rhymes with ‘orange’?”

13. “Guess what I’m thinking.”

14. “I don’t like my feet.”

15. “I think we should start making our own ketchup from scratch.”

16.  “I have more Facebook friends than you do.”

17. “Honey, wake up. Your snoring doesn’t bother me, of course, but the entire country just went on Defcon-4 and the house is surrounded. Could you answer the door?”

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